A Buddhist Nun, A Catholic Priest, A Trappist Monk, A Christian Apologist... just to name a few, and no it isn't a joke

The words formed in my thoughts as if there was going to be a joke that could be told.  Their names splashed upon the screen within my mind.  A Buddhist Nun, a Catholic Priest, a Trappist Monk, a Christian apologist, and so many many more.

Then as if in a pause I saw a picture of a red hot stove and I saw my 6 children standing before the appliance. Within my heart I heard the whispers; "when I was a child, I used to speak as a child, think like a child, reason like a child." And the still quiet whispers continued; "... and you have come to need milk and not solid food."  The whispers faded away. In their stead were the pictures of my children once again standing before the hot, red stove.

Words and pictures all dancing together and formed out within my heart a hunger for discernment.  The reality of the Lord is spirit and where the Spirit of the Lord is there is liberty.  The hunger for liberty, for freedom, for joy and for truth coursed through my entire being.  The trust of Spirit to lead into all truth only growing.

Before going forward I would like to go back.

When my oldest was two and he lifted his hand as if to place it upon the red, hot stove I was there to keep him from burning himself.  Now when my oldest is twenty and living on his own he knows how to use the stove to cook for himself and his friends.  When he was a child I kept him as safe as I could.  Now that he is an adult he has learned discernment and reason and knows or learns what happens upon any specific decision.

When our oldest son was fifteen my husband and I got into a "discussion," about things he was watching, listening to and so on... And in those moments my husband's brilliance soared.  He recognized our job had shifted.  That in order to now get our son into adulthood we had to communicate trust.  We had to show him that we trusted him to either make the better decisions or to face the consequences of not doing so.  I love the vision that my husband has in his heart to mature our children into adulthood.  I love how he teaches them discernment.  I love how he teaches them to move away from childish things and actually become adults.  I love the adults our children are becoming.

Time for maturity.
Time for growth.
Time for trust.
Time for discernment.

But how?  I want to give you pieces of the puzzle and then I want to continue to paint the picture.

When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love.  1 Corinthians 13:11

And another piece.....

Concerning him we have much to say, and it is hard to explain, since you have become dull of hearing. For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you have need again for someone to teach you the elementary principles of the oracles of God, and you have come to need milk and not solid food. For everyone who partakes only of milk is not accustomed to the word of righteousness, for he is an infant. But solid food is for the mature, who because of practice have their senses trained to discern good and evil.  Hebrews 5:12-14  (Verse 14 is the guiding verse for our families life and organization). 

We don't want our 20 year olds acting like our 5 year olds. I have one of each and believe me I don't. As it is in the natural so it must be in spiritual growth and development.  There must be a movement away from feeding to empowering.  From controlling to equipping.  From childhood to adulthood. From milk to meat. From ignorance and fear to discernment and life.

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I thought like a child, and I reasoned with childish understanding.  Within a longing towards maturity I ached.  I knew there was a more and I knew I only knew in part.  The initial prayers towards trust, towards leaning, towards believing that Spirit can indeed do that which Spirit does brought me upon a path towards that more.

In my journey I found a Sufi poet who brilliantly articulated concepts better than any I had heard prior, a woman who had become a nun in the Buddhist tradition whose words fell upon my entire being and brought forth healing and hope, a Catholic priest whose writings taught me to embrace, "both and," more than "either or," and two Trappist Monks whose understanding on meditation and centering prayer catapulted me towards life.

There are stoves out there that are red hot but that heat can cook as well as harm.

So what becomes the difference?

The end of chapter 5 in the book of Hebrews within the Christian scriptures gives us an answer.

For everyone who partakes only of milk is not accustomed to the word of righteousness, for he is an infant. But solid food is for the mature, who because of practice have their senses trained to discern good and evil.

How can we ascertain what is right?  Let us cease being infantile and grow and mature and practice discernment.

This wasn't easy for me.  This was very hard and disorienting for me at times.  I was a round peg/round hole kind of girl.  I was a black is black and white is white and this is that and that is this, and here are my boxes and aren't they pretty and neat and well articulated.  I was smart and careful and in my own eyes seemed wise.  Except I wasn't discerning.  I was allowing others to give me fish and tell me this is food. Or allowing others to say we don't touch that, we don't go there, we don't do that.

It was to the Samarias that they said we don't go, it is the Samaritans that they said were dangerous, less than, not true worshippers.  But when upon the terrains of Samaria I began to sojourn I saw Samaria wasn't dangerous. And as I looked back I saw the boxes I had been contained within were actually the truest danger to freedom.

I want to grow up and leave childish mentalities behind me.  Holes aren't always square and neither are pegs, and there is a whole lot of beautiful color out there to explore and play with and splash in.  I want to move beyond milk and learn what is the meat of the Spiritual realm and understanding.  What is the power of love?  What is the beauty of light? What is the magnificence of breathe?  

I trust that perfect love is guiding me and will lead me away from fear and destruction and will if I let it guide me into all truth....


I leave to you some quotes from said Nun, Monk, Priest, Apologist, Poet... But I purposefully don't attribute which to which.....  I want you to hear with the ears of your heart the beauty and truth that reasonates..

The complementary movement towards divine love is growth in humility which is the acceptance of the reality about ourselves, our own weakness and limitations.

“The beginning of love is the will to let those we love be perfectly themselves, the resolution not to twist them to fit our own image. If in loving them we do not love what they are, but only their potential likeness to ourselves, then we do not love them: we only love the reflection of ourselves we find in them” 

God's first language is Silence. Everything else is a translation.

“You do not need to know precisely what is happening, or exactly where it is all going. What you need is to recognize the possibilities and challenges offered by the present moment,
and to embrace them with courage, faith and hope.”

“Our job is to love others without stopping to inquire whether or not they are worthy. That is not our business and, in fact, it is nobody's business. What we are asked to do is to love, and this love itself will render both ourselves and our neighbors worthy.”  

The only reason we don't open our hearts and minds to other people is that they trigger confusion in us that we don't feel brave enough or sane enough to deal with. To the degree that we look clearly and compassionately at ourselves, we feel confident and fearless about looking into someone else's eyes. ” 

“Life is glorious, but life is also wretched. It is both. Appreciating the gloriousness inspires us, encourages us, cheers us up, gives us a bigger perspective, energizes us. We feel connected. But if that's all that's happening, we get arrogant and start to look down on others, and there is a sense of making ourselves a big deal and being really serious about it, wanting it to be like that forever. The gloriousness becomes tinged by craving and addiction. On the other hand, wretchedness--life's painful aspect--softens us up considerably. Knowing pain is a very important ingredient of being there for another person. When you are feeling a lot of grief, you can look right into somebody's eyes because you feel you haven't got anything to lose--you're just there. The wretchedness humbles us and softens us, but if we were only wretched, we would all just go down the tubes. We'd be so depressed, discouraged, and hopeless that we wouldn't have enough energy to eat an apple. Gloriousness and wretchedness need each other. One inspires us, the other softens us. They go together.” 

“Forgiveness is the name of love practiced among people who love poorly. The hard truth is that all people love poorly. We need to forgive and be forgiven every day, every hour increasingly. That is the great work of love among the fellowship of the weak that is the human family.”  

“A waiting person is a patient person. The word patience means the willingness to stay where we are and live the situation out to the full in the belief that something hidden there will manifest itself to us.” 

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”  

“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.”  

So how then do we proceed?

With discernment...

With love..

With patience...

With kindness..

With wisdom....

With trust...

With courage..

With faith..